In commercials, you always see people laughing. This is done for a reason: the more a person smiles, the more atractive the person becomes, and the more attractive the product becomes that is presented in the commercial.
Smiling people sell better, thats an old saying in the creation of commercials. The faces on the covers on the magazines in the kiosks look with a laughing face at the costumers, trying to get their attention. A human face plus a laugh is an old sales trick. Even the classical music industry uses this rule. On cd covers of classical music cd’s and dvd’s we often see a singer or conductor smiling.
Laughing, what does it mean and why cant we do without it? If you look from a distance to people who are cheerful and observe their bodylanguage, then it takes notice that a laugh is a remarkable expression: the eyes become little wrinkles, the mouth opens up to become a huge whole. The shoulders move up and down and often laughing people bring their hands towards their faces. Apart from this, laughing gives us a good feeling, it works in a relaxing way, it lowers stress levels and it can even prevail that we get infections.
So in a nutshell: laughing is really healthy and it is liberating. Duchenne, a pioneer in facial expressions, calls the laugh the sweet emotion of the human soul.
Globally, you can speak of communication when some body tries to influence another person by transferring information. This happens amongst people aswel as animals. Lasswell has made a model to clarify communication.
He asks 5 questions to analyse the communication channel: Who? Says what? In which channel? To whom? With what effect? Shannon added two more concepts: encoding and decoding a message. Encoding means that the messenger sends his message in some kind of form. Usually its the spoken language, but it can be written or nonverbal as well. Decoding means the opposite, the receiver translates the encoded message in a certain meaning (of the message). This looks as follows:
As you may know, men arent too good in speaking about their feelings. Usually you can notice a (slight) difference in their behaviour, but its very hard to find out what its about. Especially when you got the idea that their is something on their mind, you ask for it and get the same answer over and over: ‘what do you mean, I feel fine, its nothing’. And I agree, men arent the easiest to be around with if you consider the ‘talk about feelings’ area. Therefor its a good thing we have body language to decypher what is going on in their minds, because bodylanguage reveals alot more then you would imagine.
It can be really hard to understand a baby. They cant express themselves by language yet since they haven learned any words yet. And for strangers its really hard to understand what a baby really wants. If your a mother, you’ll learn the bodylanguage of your baby very quick, but for the other family members it can be frustrating not to understand what your baby means. And a baby sit often doenst have a clue at all.
Most people think babies can only express themselves by crying. When they need something, like food or a drink, or when they feel pain or tired, sometimes it seems that all a baby can do is cry. But this isnt true at all, a baby has many ways to communicate its needs, you just need to pick up the signals.
Interpersonal attraction between two persons has different levels. You can feel attracted (or feel sympathy to use another word) to a person, but dont feel love for him or her, but you like the person and maybe a friendship grows out of it.
When you find some one attractive, you will show it in your non verbal behaviour and communication. You look more at him or her when you conversate, your pupils get enlarged, your posture and gestures are focused more on him or her. You can tell if people are attracted to each other when they talk to each other by watching their bodylanguage. When they find each other attractive, their legs and bodies are pointed to another. It even happens that they exclude other people in their surroundings from their conversation.
Usually, we dont cry at our desks at work, run down the halls in happiness or punch collegues who frustrate us. We live in a culture that doesnt encourage tremendous emotional displays, especially in the work space. The rules of expression in a culture are called cultural display rules, and they vary depending on the emotion, the person expressing it and the situation.
Because we dont always feel internally what the cultural display rules dictate, our nonverbal behaviour can reveal feelings that we wish to conceal. We may not be actually sad at a funeral or happy at a wedding, but the nonverbal communication can reveal how we really feel.
The technique involves observing other people’s body language to notice what works and why it works – as well as what doesn’t work and why it doesn’t work. You can do this exercise right now thanks to the Internet. Go on YouTube and find a video of someone who you look up to and who is notably famous. Don’t get distracted by watching the plethora of available videos! Do the exercise!
If you have found a video of this person you are after, turn all sound off, watch the video, and observe his or her body language. Take note of what makes the person interesting. What is good about their body language?
Once you’ve watched a video of a person you like, find a video of an everyday person. Again, watch this video with the sound off. Observe this person’s body language and compare the difference to the body language of the person you admire. It is not guaranteed, but the person who is notably more successful will appear more interesting than the everyday person due to their differences in body language. Ask yourself what parts of their body language could be improved. Begin using the body language lessons you have learned.
Like mentioned before, roughly 60-93% of our communication is nonverbal. That is a very big amount of information given throu the body we can read. Much of this nonverbal information that is given throu the body is something that people are either unaware of or unable to control effectively. If you compare it with our spoken language, we control our speech relatively well, when it comes to saying the right things on the right occasion.
But our words may say one thing, our body often betray us when it comes to the right information. Everybody knows the example when you give some one a present. They might say that they love it, but you can see in their eyes or face that they dont mean it.
Part of the reason we’re unable to control our nonverbal communication is that it occurs across so many parts of the body. Unlike words, which provide information via their content and some of the qualities of the voice (such as the tone and speed), nonverbal communication involves the entire body – the face, eyes, body posture, the movement of the hands and so on. That is alot to manage at one time. Considering this, its not a surprise that people aren’t able to fake certain things nonverbally. There is so many area’s to control, feelings often leak out in several different parts of the body. That is the reason it is so hard to become good at reading body language, there is so much you need to watch to come to good conclusions.
It takes some effort and time to learn to read a girl’s body language. Especially when you’re a guy, because its proven that women are better in observing social behaviour when men. Most men dont even notice the most basic nonverbal signs a girl sends out when communicating (sorry guys, but its scientifically proven). Since you read or heard that over 80% of a conversation consists of nonverbal signs and communication, you can figure out there is a whole new world to discover. The body language that is used during a conversation can tell you almost everything you need to know about that person. So some one who has learned to read body language will get loads more information and see the world from a much deeper perspective.