Getting rid of weak bodylanguage
We’ve all met someone who displays weak body language. He’s the guy who communicates the wrong message around women. This is someone who you meet and intuitively know that he’s not very good with women. He doesn’t have to say a word, but you’re already convinced that the ladies are not knocking down his door to date him. It’s not what he says, it’s how he acts!
On some level, you’ve picked up on his body language and gotten an uncomfortable vibe from being around him. In essence, his non-verbal communication is telling you that he does NOT have the confidence to attract many women.
We’re all different in how we display body language. Some can command a powerful presence. Others display the weak aura that’s naturally repulsive to a woman.
It can be really hard to understand a baby. They cant express themselves by language yet since they haven learned any words yet. And for strangers its really hard to understand what a baby really wants. If your a mother, you’ll learn the bodylanguage of your baby very quick, but for the other family members it can be frustrating not to understand what your baby means. And a baby sit often doenst have a clue at all.
Most people think babies can only express themselves by crying. When they need something, like food or a drink, or when they feel pain or tired, sometimes it seems that all a baby can do is cry. But this isnt true at all, a baby has many ways to communicate its needs, you just need to pick up the signals.
Usually, we dont cry at our desks at work, run down the halls in happiness or punch collegues who frustrate us. We live in a culture that doesnt encourage tremendous emotional displays, especially in the work space. The rules of expression in a culture are called cultural display rules, and they vary depending on the emotion, the person expressing it and the situation.
Because we dont always feel internally what the cultural display rules dictate, our nonverbal behaviour can reveal feelings that we wish to conceal. We may not be actually sad at a funeral or happy at a wedding, but the nonverbal communication can reveal how we really feel.
The technique involves observing other people’s body language to notice what works and why it works – as well as what doesn’t work and why it doesn’t work. You can do this exercise right now thanks to the Internet. Go on YouTube and find a video of someone who you look up to and who is notably famous. Don’t get distracted by watching the plethora of available videos! Do the exercise!
If you have found a video of this person you are after, turn all sound off, watch the video, and observe his or her body language. Take note of what makes the person interesting. What is good about their body language?
Once you’ve watched a video of a person you like, find a video of an everyday person. Again, watch this video with the sound off. Observe this person’s body language and compare the difference to the body language of the person you admire. It is not guaranteed, but the person who is notably more successful will appear more interesting than the everyday person due to their differences in body language. Ask yourself what parts of their body language could be improved. Begin using the body language lessons you have learned.
Like mentioned before, roughly 60-93% of our communication is nonverbal. That is a very big amount of information given throu the body we can read. Much of this nonverbal information that is given throu the body is something that people are either unaware of or unable to control effectively. If you compare it with our spoken language, we control our speech relatively well, when it comes to saying the right things on the right occasion.
But our words may say one thing, our body often betray us when it comes to the right information. Everybody knows the example when you give some one a present. They might say that they love it, but you can see in their eyes or face that they dont mean it.
Part of the reason we’re unable to control our nonverbal communication is that it occurs across so many parts of the body. Unlike words, which provide information via their content and some of the qualities of the voice (such as the tone and speed), nonverbal communication involves the entire body – the face, eyes, body posture, the movement of the hands and so on. That is alot to manage at one time. Considering this, its not a surprise that people aren’t able to fake certain things nonverbally. There is so many area’s to control, feelings often leak out in several different parts of the body. That is the reason it is so hard to become good at reading body language, there is so much you need to watch to come to good conclusions.
It takes some effort and time to learn to read a girl’s body language. Especially when you’re a guy, because its proven that women are better in observing social behaviour when men. Most men dont even notice the most basic nonverbal signs a girl sends out when communicating (sorry guys, but its scientifically proven). Since you read or heard that over 80% of a conversation consists of nonverbal signs and communication, you can figure out there is a whole new world to discover. The body language that is used during a conversation can tell you almost everything you need to know about that person. So some one who has learned to read body language will get loads more information and see the world from a much deeper perspective.
If you want to learn to read bodylanguage, observing animals is a good starting point. Humans and animals are much alike when it comes to subjects like territorial behaviour and behaviour in groups. Many of the insights into nonverbal communication have come from experiments and studying of animals. A type of animal behaviour that has long been termed instinctive is the fighting of dogs. When two male dogs meet they may react in a number of ways, but the most common is the snarling, snapping simulation of a fight to the death.
A person new to this behaviour will be alarmed and tries to seperate the dogs. The knowing dog owner simply watches, realizing how much of the fight is symbolic. This doesnt mean the fight isnt real, on the contrary, the dogs are competing for mastery. One will win, because he is more aggressive, perhaps stronger and with harder drives than the other. The fight is over at the point when both dogs realize that one is the victor, though no skin has been broken. Then a curious thing happens: the vanquished dog lies down, rolls over and exposes his throat to the victor.
So what do i need to pay attention to when observing a girl’s body language?
When you first start with learning to read bodylanguage, it is good to know that there are two sorts of body language: an open and a close one. You can see open body language (or gestures) when a girl is interested or attracted to another person, and closed body language are signs that she isnt interested. And it isnt the case of one or the other, this may change in the course of a conversation. Maybe a girl you meet doesnt pay any attention to you in the first place and she will display closed body language gestures. But as time passes, she might change her mind when she starts noticing you and reveal open body language gestures. It is a nice mirror for your own behaviour as well: in what situations do you notice open gestures in a girl’s body language and when are they closed?
Bodylanguage, is that something i can learn?
Bodylanguage is a hot item nowadays. In movies, series and books, but also in the dating field nonverbal communication is used on a very regular basis, but most people dont even recognize it. Thou bodylanguage (or nonverbal communication) is used more then verbal communication and its universal, meaning the nonverbal signs used in Europe are roughly the same as the bodylanguage used in, for example, China. A smile is a smile and a laugh is a laugh, and it means the same in Tokio as in Washington or Berlin.
But what is bodylanguage?
It is all about one thing: trying or learning to ‘read’ people and their behaviour.
Ofcourse you can learn to read and recognize bodylanguage, but its more then just a ten point checklist!
There are so many things you can take into account when you try to read a person’s bodylanguage, like the differences between men and women. For people you just meet it is alot harder to understand their body language, and its much dependent on the context you meet some one in. When people are in groups and communicate with each other, there is alot more to discover about the people then just the gestures they make or the way they stand or hold their arms.
And that is why is so much fun to learn to read bodylanguage. There is always something new to discover, new researches, new information and new insights. And there a re many fields where you can get information about bodylanguage, like psychology, pedagogy and phrenology. And all of these fields relate, so all the knowledge you gain in a subject can help you to understand bodylanguage better.
Maybe your baby cant speak yet, it can make alot of it needs clear to you with nonverbal language. Gestures are a form of communicating they know very well.
The average child start to speak its first words between the 13th and 18th month, but the communication starts alot earlier. Crying is a form of communication, but rubbing its eyes and sucking on its hands counts as communication as well. With a bit of experience you may tell what your baby is trying to make clear to you. Is it hungry or tired? The older a child gets, the more needs it gets. In stead of only communicating when its tired or hungry, it will try to make clear what kind of food it prefers or with what materials it wishes to play.