Nonverbal communication reveals more then you think

October 23, 2011 by · Comments Off on Nonverbal communication reveals more then you think
Filed under: Learn bodylanguage 

Usually, we dont cry at our desks at work, run down the halls in happiness or punch collegues who frustrate us. We live in a culture that doesnt encourage tremendous emotional displays, especially in the work space. The rules of expression in a culture are called cultural display rules, and they vary depending on the emotion, the person expressing it and the situation.

Because we dont always feel internally what the cultural display rules dictate, our nonverbal behaviour can reveal feelings that we wish to conceal. We may not be actually sad at a funeral or happy at a wedding, but the nonverbal communication can reveal how we really feel.

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Learn body language by observing others

October 20, 2011 by · Comments Off on Learn body language by observing others
Filed under: Learn bodylanguage 

The technique involves observing other people’s body language to notice what works and why it works – as well as what doesn’t work and why it doesn’t work. You can do this exercise right now thanks to the Internet. Go on YouTube and find a video of someone who you look up to and who is notably famous. Don’t get distracted by watching the plethora of available videos! Do the exercise!

If you have found a video of this person you are after, turn all sound off, watch the video, and observe his or her body language. Take note of what makes the person interesting. What is good about their body language?

Once you’ve watched a video of a person you like, find a video of an everyday person. Again, watch this video with the sound off. Observe this person’s body language and compare the difference to the body language of the person you admire. It is not guaranteed, but the person who is notably more successful will appear more interesting than the everyday person due to their differences in body language. Ask yourself what parts of their body language could be improved. Begin using the body language lessons you have learned.

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Bodylanguage doesnt lie

October 20, 2011 by · Comments Off on Bodylanguage doesnt lie
Filed under: Learn bodylanguage 

Like mentioned before, roughly 60-93% of our communication is nonverbal. That is a very big amount of information given throu the body we can read. Much of this nonverbal information that is given throu the body is something that people are either unaware of or unable to control effectively. If you compare it with our spoken language, we control our speech relatively well, when it comes to saying the right things on the right occasion.

But our words may say one thing, our body often betray us when it comes to the right information. Everybody knows the example when you give some one a present. They might say that they love it, but you can see in their eyes or face that they dont mean it.
Part of the reason we’re unable to control our nonverbal communication is that it occurs across so many parts of the body. Unlike words, which provide information via their content and some of the qualities of the voice (such as the tone and speed), nonverbal communication involves the entire body – the face, eyes, body posture, the movement of the hands and so on. That is alot to manage at one time. Considering this, its not a surprise that people aren’t able to fake certain things nonverbally. There is so many area’s to control, feelings often leak out in several different parts of the body. That is the reason it is so hard to become good at reading body language, there is so much you need to watch to come to good conclusions.

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Different intonations of the voice

August 23, 2011 by · Comments Off on Different intonations of the voice
Filed under: Learn bodylanguage 

Often we dont actively listen or notice the tone of a person’s voice, but it has become so common, that we pay little attention to it. We are used that a person yells when he is mad, and talks softly when he is ashamed. With the intonation of your voice you can give a spoken message more strenght, or the opposite, weaken it down.

When you want to learn to read bodylanguage, there are alot of factors you can use to come to a better judgement. Ok, the tone of the voice is verbal meaning you can hear it, but the purpose the tone serves, is often not discussed or mentioned, and therefor you can call it nonverbal as wel.

There are alot of ways you can use your voice, this can be a very good indicator and helps alot to read and understand certain social situations.

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The intonation of a voice tells alot about a person

June 23, 2011 by · Comments Off on The intonation of a voice tells alot about a person
Filed under: Learn bodylanguage 

The tone or intonation of your voice is an important part of the body language. Not the words your pronounce, but the way you do it can tell alot about some one’s personality. And like body language, alot of people arent aware that their voice gives away alot of information.

Can you judge a person only by hearing their voice?

You all know the example of hearing a person for the first time on the telephone. Automatically you make an image of that person in your head, based on the voice you hear. If the person is a fast talker, then you see that person as self confident, because he isnt afraid to speak and knows to articulate well. Opposite of that is a person you really need to focus to hear them well, because they speak with a soft voice. In this case the person gives a shy, maybe scared impression.

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What is bodylanguage?

May 17, 2011 by · Comments Off on What is bodylanguage?
Filed under: Learn bodylanguage 

Bodylanguage, is that something i can learn?

Bodylanguage is a hot item nowadays. In movies, series and books, but also in the dating field nonverbal communication is used on a very regular basis, but most people dont even recognize it. Thou bodylanguage (or nonverbal communication) is used more then verbal communication and its universal, meaning the nonverbal signs used in Europe are roughly the same as the bodylanguage used in, for example, China. A smile is a smile and a laugh is a laugh, and it means the same in Tokio as in Washington or Berlin.

But what is bodylanguage?

It is all about one thing: trying or learning to ‘read’ people and their behaviour.

Ofcourse you can learn to read and recognize bodylanguage, but its more then just a ten point checklist!

There are so many things you can take into account when you try to read a person’s bodylanguage, like the differences between men and women. For people you just meet it is alot harder to understand their body language, and its much dependent on the context you meet some one in. When people are in groups and communicate with each other, there is alot more to discover about the people then just the gestures they make or the way they stand or hold their arms.

And that is why is so much fun to learn to read bodylanguage. There is always something new to discover, new researches, new information and new insights. And there a re many fields where you can get information about bodylanguage, like psychology, pedagogy and phrenology. And all of these fields relate, so all the knowledge you gain in a subject can help you to understand bodylanguage better.

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A physical defence in social situations

April 23, 2011 by · Comments Off on A physical defence in social situations
Filed under: Gestures 

Social situations can be very emotionally threatening for people. When we grow up, we learn to use and train different nonverbal mechanisms to hide this insecurity, but in every age category, as a small child or adult, a trained eye can easily recognize these bodylanguage signals.

If a social situation feels threatening, it is in our nature to throw up a (nonverbal) barricade. For a small child it is easy to hide behind its mother if they meet a stranger on the street or in a store. They can hide their face behind their hands, pull their hat over their face or crawl higher in the safe arms of their parent. From this position the child feels more at ease to look at the stranger to see what their actions are. We all recognize the feeling to be safe in our bed with the sheets covering our face; its one of the few places we can really feel safe, even as an adult.

Adults who suffer from depression it is a saying heared alot: ‘All i want to do is lie in bed and sleep all day’. Its a different way of saying ‘ im too afraid to step into the real world and face the uncomfortable situations i might encounter’. Of course depressed people feel left out of energy, but the step to come out of bed and meet the world is a step you need to take, how threatening the world around them might seem to feel…

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