You can try it yourself. Say ‘no’ but nod ‘Yes’. Im sure you can do it, but it takes alot of effort. Body language and spoken language are two different languages. We speak and understand them both. The importance of body language for communication can hardly be underestimated. There are authors who argue that more than half of what is communicated is done through body language. There are authors who argue that at least 70 percent. It’s not about the number. Realize that your body is just as important as what you say and how you say it.
When you want to give your partner a positive feeling, you can tell him is that he’s a whopper. But its more effective to just look at him and smile or nod with interest what he says. Turn it around. There is nothing so destructive as when you tell someone a story and he or she gives no response to what you say. You are not fascinating enough. “Yesterday I was at a fun workshop …” Monty says. John’s responds with “Is there still coffee left in that can?” That hurts. You can almost feel it physically. Conversely: “Yesterday I was at a fun workshop …” Monty says. John reacts with “Tell me, what was it about?” and he turns his body towards Monty and gives him a warm smile. You can be sure, the next 5 assignments from monty are given to John. Read more
Attention to the first impression
You know: the first impression you make only once and usually its nonverbal, its about the impression you give of yourself. And that first impression is most important. The first impression determines whether someone will go with you. Its that easy. In a second or two, people form a picture of the other allowing them to decide whether the other is “worthwhile”.
The spotlight on you
This means that you really have to think about that first impression you make on people. What kind of clothes do you wear, how do you stand, how do you walk and how do you give people a hand? You don’t have to wear Armani suits to radiate success. This is mostly a matter of clothes that fit you well and give a certain flair. But if you’re far too thick, wear an old sweater that needs a washand wear a trouser that is a few sizes too large, you wont win people’s favors immediatelly. In other words: make sure your appearance fits your surroundings. And if you feel that wearing a tie doesnt fit you well, you might consider the question of whether you chose the right work environment. Read more